Thursday, March 20, 2008

Why

do I always feel like people--particularly men--particularly straight men--are doing me a favor by being my friend?

9 comments:

[kɹeɪ̯g̊] said...

Actually you are doing them a favour. Because they have a gay friend, they tell themselves that they are actually really open-minded and cool.

But seriously, I do know what you mean. I honestly don't have much in common with most straight men, and find it hard to conversate (I love back-formations) without trying really hard. And then it just gets awkward.

Speaking of back-formations, "back-formation" has its own back-formation, "back-formate". So you might say I back-formated the word "conversation".

Isn't linguistics fun?

As for why? (Back to the subject). Its hard to relate to people you don't have much in common, or perceive not to have much in common with. Maybe you feel they won't find you interesting so you think they couldn't be honestly interested in you as a person? That's kind of how I feel too.

Edgy said...

Because that's what I pay them to do. ;)

Oh. And Craig ought to have shared this link with you.

Mr. Fob said...

I'm not sure how much of a favor I'm doing anybody--I can't imagine that saying you have a heterosexually-married gay friend makes you look open-minded and cool in many social circles.

But thank you, Edgy, for paying people to be my friends. I'd be pretty lonely without your generosity.

[kɹeɪ̯g̊] said...

Indeed I thought about sharing that link, but then was so enamoured by back-formations that I forgot.

Mr. Fob said...

They are enamouring, aren't they?

[kɹeɪ̯g̊] said...

They are enamouring, aren't they?

Amazingly so.

Mr. Fob said...

Never met a back-formation I didn't like.

My Ice Cream Diary said...

Hmmm, I wonder if it is the same reason I feel like highly educated (on paper anyway) people are doing me a favor by conversing with me at parties. I think this goes along with the last of the first comment.

Mr. Fob said...

Yeah, it probably all comes down to our self-image, and the places we feel indebted to others for their gracious condescension are likely the places where we could work on improving that self-image. Or something.