Friday, March 21, 2008

Fascinating Manhood

Yesterday while my wife was at work and I was busy preparing a nice warm meal for her to come home to, the microwave stopped working. None of the buttons I pressed did a thing! Now, I know a lot of boys might panic at such a predicament, knowing how important it is to have dinner ready before their woman comes home. Some househusbands would go straight to the phone and call a repairwoman out to fix the microwave, thinking this is the best way to avoid adding any complication to their wife's already-stressful workday. I, however, know better. Where others see calamity, I saw opportunity--an opportunity to reaffirm my complete and utter dependence on my woman, and for her to reaffirm her womanliness.

When my wife got home from work I put on my best pouty face and said in a childlike whine, "Honey, I broke the microwave." I was sure to bat my eyelashes and look as cute as I could in my little apron when I said this.

My wife smiled and shook her head. "It's probably just the outlet, sweetie."

"If you say so," I said with hunched shoulders and an ever-so-slightly tilted head. "You know I don't understand those kinds of things--I'm just a boy."

She sighed. "I'm exhausted right now. I'll take a look at it tomorrow. Where's my dinner?"

I quickly dished up the broccoli cheese soup and the potatoes I'd baked in the oven, then stood by the table and watched my sweetcake enjoy the meal.

I was a little worried we'd have to buy a new microwave, as I know finances stress my honey out--I don't bother with such things myself, as I just have to ask for a blank check when I need something--but of course my silly concerns were unfounded. This morning while I was out running my little errands, my good wife fixed everything. Flipped the breaker or some such gobbledy-gook.

The important thing is that my wife knows I need her, and that's why she loves me. This Celestial Love is what makes our marriage so great!


Julie said...

That's pretty funny, especially considering I am often the one to fix or figure out how to fix things and the one in charge of the finances. =) Though I am also reasonably certain to have a nice hot meal ready for my husband when he comes home for work.

Mr. Fob said...

You, Julie, are every woman--it's all in you.

My Ice Cream Diary said...

This had me laughing. You seem to have the "I'm just a boy" routine down pat.

My husband's way of getting out of trouble is to just say, "Honey, I'm a man and men are stupid." I don't actually agree with that, but for some reason it does help him get out of trouble... sometimes.

Mr. Fob said...

I work hard to refine my helpless stupidity.

bigbrownhouse said...

Good Lord it's STILL IN PRINT?

Mr. Fob said...

If it weren't then who would teach us to use antiquated gender roles to manipulate the people we love?

Bets Enslin said...

I also have a wonderful hubbie whom Love's to cook but he should be nr one; we woman are here just to love and admire him and compliment him for his masculinity this is what makes him adore his wife intensely.