Saturday, October 20, 2007

An Open Letter to the Mindless Masses

Dear Masses,

I had an idea tonight.

What if, instead of everyone in America being football fans, we varied things up a bit? You know, some people could be into football and others could be into lacrosse and others could be into scuba diving and others could be into Parcheesi? Then maybe, just maybe, every time there's a stupid football game at stupid Husky Stadium they wouldn't have to close all the stupid streets I need to get to my stupid home! (Wait, scratch that last stupid.) And then, while we're at it, maybe we could get some funding at our universities for programs besides football--maybe, I don't know, something remotely related to education?

I dunno. Just an idea.

Love,

Mr. Fob

10 comments:

FoxyJ said...

I think you should turn this into an online petition.

Katria said...

Can I be one of the Parcheesi fans?

Miss Hass said...

Yes, I totally agree. We had an "important" football game here yesterday and traffic was backed up 4 miles from the stadium. I just don't get it.

Recession Cone said...

I thought I had it bad while I lived in Provo, but I must say that Berkeley is worse. I'd imagine it's not that easy in Seattle either, but you've given me a good opening to vent. =)
Imagine building a city on a narrow strip of land between the mountains and the bay. The local government is so adamantly opposed to cars that they place permanent (though unmarked on the map) concrete barriers in the middle of perfectly good streets to disrupt traffic. This government is slavishly and reactionarily opposed to development of almost any kind, but especially development for cars, which means that in the city of 120,000 people, there are no streets with more than two lanes on each side. Except for the freeway, which unfortunately is the main gateway for all the heathen tourists going to San Francisco for the weekend and therefore flows at about 3 miles per hour on Saturdays.

The football stadium is not located someplace logical, which would mean a place with roads and parking, instead it is built at the top of the mountain, higher than anything else on campus, and it straddles a deadly fault (it's slowly being pulled apart).

All of these things put together make traffic in Berkeley intolerable when there is a game. What a waste (especially since our team has decided to lose!)

Th. said...

.

"Our team"? When did you suddenly forgive Berkeley football?

Q for Mr Fob: Doesn't football pay for itself?

Not to be on football's side or anything.....

Recession Cone said...

I haven't. It was just a convenient pronoun.

JB said...

Football. Bleh. Those of us who stay at home to read or watch TV don't block up the roads! :D Yay for being a recluse?

ambrosia ananas said...

Amen and amen.

Janci said...

I hate game days. It took me twenty minutes to drive three blocks on Saturday, because I went NEAR the freeway onramp half an hour before the game.

I'd sign the petition.

Rebecca said...

Hmmm, interesting idea. Dare I say, new and different? That some people could be interested in other things...I may have to do some research, and see what these "other things" are.