So our thirteen-hour trip yesterday was actually a fifteen-hour trip. We had many potty and diaper changing stops, and at both lunch and dinner S-Boogie needed some time to run around a bit. Little Dude refused to nap until 6:30 in the evening, and then woke up a half-hour later. There was much screaming, but certainly not as much as there could have been. We listened to the first book in A Series of Unfortunate Events and frankly, weren't impressed. What does everybody love about this series? Perhaps it was the multipart voice cast, but I thought the dialogue was horribly stilted.
Then we listened to I Need Your Love--Is That True? : How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them Instead by Byron Katie, which we both really enjoyed. Katie speaks of loving what is--accepting reality as it is and not torturing ourselves about how it should be. She encourages people to question their thoughts rather than believe them, so instead of accepting your thought that your spouse should do or be such and such, asking yourself, "Is that true?" Usually it's not. To say that something should be other than what it is is to argue with reality, which is a battle you'll lose 100% of the time.
So I tried very hard to question my belief that my children should not be screaming at me from the backseat. This is going to take a bit more work, I think.
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7 comments:
Freaky, your reading list has a lot in common with Rosey's... first Eckhart Tolle and now Byron Katie.
So I tried very hard to question my belief that my children should not be screaming at me from the backseat. This is going to take a bit more work, I think.
You think driving 15 hours with young children is hard - wait until you drive 15 hours with teenagers ...
BWAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
Probably one of the best books I've ever read is "A Thousand Names For Joy" by Byron Katie. I've read it about 10 times now. I have found that the hardest thing to do is to remember to ask yourself the questions when you are in the heat of the moment and you’re reacting emotionally. It seems to be easier to do what she suggests in retrospect with some emotional distance from the situation.
This is a good thought. It's very much like something that was pointed out to me many years ago: The biggest contributor to DEPRESSION is EXPECTING TOO MUCH!
But still, accepting reality today, doesn't proscibe working towards a better reality for tomorrow, does it? :) Especially in regard to one's self and one's children; trying to 'change' another adult is a whole other matter.
Oops!
One minor correction:
That should read, 'one's minor children'. :)
Kudos to your kids. Long road trips still drive me insane, and I'm a grown man who has control over what he listens to in the car.
Of course, my longest road trip is from Seattle to Portland every month or so.
The language for "A Series of Unfortunate Events" IS stilted - but on purpose, which I feel is totally acceptable. I've never listened to it, so it's possible that it just doesn't come across very well that way (or the people reading it weren't doing it very well - it is very stylized and couldn't be read like most dialogue would be). Of course, it isn't everyone's taste. I like it because the whole series is so totally tongue-in-cheek (including the stilted language). However, even I find it tiresome if I read too much of it at a time.
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